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Dear PiP Subscriber

Hello and a warm welcome to all Parents, Caregivers, Grandparents, Educators and Trainers;

It has been an interesting month in the PiP stable. We have seen a plethora of diverse behaviour this month; from Learners who know nothing about discipline (but are eager to learn) to children who behave like little angels. The past 30 days has seen the matter of discipline (or lack thereof) reported in the media with alarming regularity - it is clearly a matter that is of great concern to many people. We have seen leaders in government charged with 'bad behaviour', we have seen people defiant of reprimand (when they behave in an ill-disciplined manner) - where does it end, or more to the point, where does it start?

It starts with me - as a parent. Let's look specifically at the issue of 'discipline'.

'Discipline' is an attitude that stems from the value of 'respect'. If I do not have 'respect' for myself, for other people, for property, for belongings - then I will not be disciplined.

What message is my behaviour  (as a parent) sending out to my friends, my partner, my children?

• Am I sending out a mixed message?
• Am I telling my child he should be respectful of the furniture in our house but I turn a blind eye when I see him draw on the wall in my friend's house? 
• Am I telling my son it is NOT ok to shout at his sister but I allow him to watch television programmes where there is a lot of shouting and ill-disciplined behaviour? 

This kind of mixed message results in a 'value conflict'. As a parent I must ask myself if MY OWN behaviour sends out a mixed message resulting in a confused child.

It is so hard to teach and help our children to LIVE the values we learnt from our own parents. Television, computer games and unruly influences at school contribute to the 'value conflict' experienced by our children. Amanda Roode (the founding member for The Foundation for Value Driven Education)  recommends that we 'control the environment better' - let us as parents be aware of what programmes our children are watching, let us be aware of what messages we send with our own behaviour, let us be aware of how our children behave when they are not with us.

Here are some practical ways of inculcating 'discipline' and 'respect'.

• Respect for things (respect for the furniture in the house, respect for my schoolbag, respect for my lunchbox, respect for my cricket bat) - help your child to empty his school bag within 10 minutes of arriving home. He washes his own lunchbox and puts it in the right place for next day's lunch; he oils his own cricket bat (with Dad’s help) and packs it in its bag ready for the next game or practice session. Doing this every day he becomes disciplined about caring for and respecting his own belongings.
• Respect for people (respect for Mom and Dad, respect for siblings, respect for Teacher, respect for the gentleman begging at the traffic light) - the tone in which I address the beggar is going to convey my 'respect' or 'disrespect'. Discuss the 'feelings' of the beggar if someone shouts at him. A child who does not understand the consequences of disrespect grows into an adult who shouts at other people. 

TIP: - If you are a Grade 2 Parent/Caregiver you may want to look at the ATTITUDES AND BEHAVIOUR activity 10 in the PiP Learner Activity Manual.

Last word for this month – please recommend our newsletter to another parent – go to www.pip-obe.com to subscribe.

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Goodbye and have fun with your angel child over the next month until we meet again!